There I was, a mom of four adult children, several of which were addicted to drugs and dying in front of me day by day. I was empty, broken, and I felt all alone in this journey. Each phone call brought anxiety and fear of reporting an overdose, incarceration, or hearing the voice of my addicted child asking for more money. To say it was a living nightmare is an understatement. Something had to change. If they weren't going to change then I had to. The day I gave my children over to God, to heal or take home, and allow Him to work in their lives, was the day I began to live again.
I couldn't convince my children to get clean. No amount of begging, pleading, or bargaining would convince them to enter treatment and take it seriously. I was dying along with them emotionally as my heart broke with every defeat. As a well grounded Christian, I knew I had to give this over to God and allow Him to protect them. I handed over the fear, worry, anxiety, and control to God Almighty and asked Him to work on healing me. But how? I didn't know anyone else in my situation so I hid all these secrets inside. Then I came across programs to help in this journey.
I became involved in Celebrate Recovery, Prison Ministry, and Concerned Persons to help me learn about co-dependency and enabling. I educated myself about my role in my children's addiction and learned how to set boundaries. I accepted that it wasn't my fault! I forgave myself for my mistakes. I had found a new freedom and God continued to strengthen me and give me friends to help. There was joy and happiness in my life despite the continued addiction in my children's lives.
So where does soap making come into this picture? Well, I had begun making soap for my family about the same time that they started using drugs. I found that I could escape into my own world when I was soaping. I really enjoyed experimenting with different scents and colors! I could focus on something fun and not allow dreadful thoughts to sneak into my mind. Then one day it hit me! I was making something to help people get physically clean as I was praying for my own children to get clean from addiction. That's when making soap became more of a mission rather than a hobby.
I turned my family farm into a mission of creating unique and artistic goat milk soaps to provide income to support us, and also donate a portion to local recovery programs. The business name, Soap Addiction, was chosen to reflect the history and the aspect of getting clean. Each soap also has a name that embodies the different steps of healing from addiction, like Forgiveness and Surrender, for example. I have a passion for sharing how God has healed me with other people, especially parents! My prayer is that all my products will create conversations so that testimonies of recovery and God's goodness can bring hope one bar at a time. Each soap also has a Bible scripture connected with it's name. Hopefully whoever receives the soap will take the time to look up the verse that will speak to them personally. I love when I receive emails or calls from someone who was blessed by the message and mission behind my soaps. Sharing my journey with others glorifies God and gives hope to the hurting. And donating funds to recovery programs gives addicts the chance of recovery too.
I hope to branch out to more retail stores, and even grow to be in other states. I would love to employ men and women who are in recovery! Your purchase of my products helps to spread the word and get more people "addicted" to these wonderful handmade goat milk soaps. Thank you for choosing Soap Addiction and supporting my mission. God Bless You! Jennifer